Don't Forget to Remember: The Importance of Family Recipes, Holiday Traditions, and Stories in the Grieving Process

Medical Humanities Mondays Lecture

Lori Jakiela, PhD
Professor of English and Creative/Professional Writing
Director of the Writing Program
University of Pittsburgh at Greensburg

Abstract: Elisabeth Kubler-Ross—Swiss-born psychiatrist, pioneer in near-death studies and author of the groundbreaking book On Death and Dying—said of grief, “The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.” Many people do not or cannot take the time they need to engage with and honor loss in their everyday lives. The idea that grief is temporary, linear, something to move past and not weave into the texture of one's life, can cause pain, especially around the holidays. In this talk, Dr. Jakiela discussed how traditions and rituals, food and stories, can help honor and remember lost loved ones.